looking back.

I usually don’t do this. I’m not a huge fan of the end-of-the-year-introspection-and-resolutions that the new year usually brings. I don’t really do the retrospection, and I don’t believe in New Year’s Resolutions, so I usually greet the New Year with nothing more than the family tradition of Tripoley and a glass of sparkling cider.

But 2012 has been a big year, and 2013 is going to be bigger yet, and it strikes me that a little year-end introspection might not kill me after all (yeah, I’m late. procrastinator as always.)

2012 has been a wild ride.

The second half of my sophmore year wasn’t easy. Late-night homework sessions and too many classes brought stress, sleep-deprivation, and a healthy appreciation for caffeine. The end of my second year of college, however, comes to mind in glimpses of good times. A hiking trip full of ridiculous pictures and yelling “BOOM! HUNGAR GAMMESSS!” The feeling of success, joy, and the culmination of a lot of hard work when our dance was selected from the regional ACDFA conference for the national gala. Midnight Cookout runs, because milkshakes. Palm Sunday, the first time I visited the church that’s become my church home-away-from-home, and being terrified that I got the service time wrong when we parked and suddenly the congregation spilled out through the doors (in order to process in with palm branches, but boy did I panic). Waking up five days a week for 8 a.m. contemporary and yoga classes with a dance professor who is way more of morning person than me. Hitting the (hopefully) halfway done with college point.

Then the summer. That performance at the Kennedy Center (and roaming D.C. taking dance pictures everywhere). A conference with my student group that included an impulse decision to drive half an hour to Virginia Beach and jump into the ocean at 10 p.m. Watching movies way past midnight with my best friends. And of course six and a half weeks of camp, full of laughter, exhaustion, fun, band-aids, sweat, and co-workers that are better defined as family.

Back to Greensboro again, settling in for my junior year. Taking more credit hours than I should have been allowed to, and somehow surviving thanks to good friends, Starbucks, and pure stubbornness. More Cookout runs, because milkshakes. That one Cookout run in particular when a friend suggested (insisted) that I go to Africa. Returning to my Greensboro church and getting to know some of my now best friends, women that love the Lord, care for me, and constantly inspire me to pursue the Him. Dance teachers that pushed me emotionally and mentally as well as physically. Late nights in the library that consisted of more laughter and tweeting than work. The huge, scary, overwhelming process of applying to study abroad which has given me the huge, scary, overwhelming opportunity to spend next semester in Malta. Lots and lots of chai tea.

A year of laughter and love, and tears too. A year of heartache and soul longing, of searching and asking, finding some answers and many more questions. A year of realizing a million ways that I fall short, and appreciating a million times that I have a good Lord who stands in for me.

So, as we move forward into the new dawn of 2013, I’ll leave you with these words of wisdom…




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